|Educated Hood Chicks||
“A one, A two, A three, ‘crunch’, A three. “ Don’t ask me, because I certainly couldn’t tell you.
I unfortunately haven’t had the time to sit and count in order to find out. And you know, that’s really a shame. Life moves so fast these days that we barely have time to smell the roses, let alone count how many times we lick a tootsie roll pop.
There was a movie that came out in the 90’s where there was a watch that allowed the character to move faster than normal through time. All the things the character could achieve by going 10 times faster than he normally would. The sad thing is, that moving faster is often our goal as well. We are always trying to figure out how we can do things faster. We are literally speeding through life, and for what?
Since I moved my office home, I have essentially become a full time stay at home mom and housewife, and even though these are extremely difficult jobs, they are so rewarding. I enjoy watching my husband and kids eat a hot meal that I prepared for them. I enjoy the silly conversations they have that are so serious to them. Some of the things I was just too busy to pay attention to. I’m not saying quit your job, or that your job is not important, of course it is, but make time for other things in life. If it’s your spouse you haven’t paid much attention to because you’re always so busy, if it’s attention to your kids, family, friends that have suffered, stop it right now and slow down.
If you want a quality life, that’s full of love, laughter and happiness, you will have to make a conscious effort in order to achieve it. It won’t come from just working, or just making money, or just getting the housework done. You will have to have a balance in your life, and that my dears, believe me, takes work. You will have to slow down, and pay attention to your life as a whole, not just one aspect of it. And it can be done. Pay attention to the Hallmark commercials, they really will make you cry, and feel good at the same time. You will be happy, and happiness is contagious, so everyone around you will be happy as well.
So today I encourage you to slow down, and enjoy the little things. Get a tootsie roll pop, and count the number of licks it’ll take you to get to the center, and enjoy your life. That’s what I plan on doing
You Are Not Alone.
You are not alone.
Yesterday I read a blog entry which was a letter from a mom to other moms. I liked it so much that I decided to do an encouraging tribute to mothers and to all parents in general.
If you don’t already know, this blog that I have entitled “My Crazy Life,” was not only a place for me to vent about all the hustle and bustle that is my life, but to also let others know, especially parents that “you are not alone.” It is always nice to know, that other s are going through the same daily “stuff” that you’re going through, and they’re making it. That means you can too.
There are times when I feel so overwhelmed that I don’t know if I can continue at the pace I’m going. You know what I’ve learned to do in those situations? Slow the heck down. Maybe the house is not spotless; maybe the kids are eating noodles and hotdogs tonight. It’s okay. Our kids just need us. They need and yearn for our attention and our love. It’s imperative that we slow down so that we can give them the love and attention they need. Believe me, noodles and hotdogs will taste like a full course meal if you’re sitting there with them asking them how school was.
There are times when I want to get away because the noise level in my house has reached an all time high. Guess what I do, I get away. How you ask? “I’m going to the bathroom.” That’s my line. I go to the bathroom and sit on the toilet and say a prayer for peace, and get me some peace. Go get you’re five minutes of peace. I know that if your kids are like mine, they’ll have the nerve to want to follow you. I have a line for that too. “Mommy has to boo boo, it stinks in here.” That will get you a couple of extra minutes.
Being a parent I know is not always what it’s cracked up to be. It’s hard work, but let me tell you, it’s worth it. Just wait until they fall asleep, and watch them. You’re mind and heart will be renewed by the love you can now remember you have for them, and it will get you charged up to do it all over again tomorrow.
Just remember, you’re not alone, you can do it and you will be the best parent in the world in your child’s eyes. I would like to end this by saying, “hang in there, it gets easier, as they get older,” but this blog is to encourage you, not to lie to you. So I will end with this, “hang in there, you are not alone and you can do it!”
Here We Go!
Today was the beginning of the hardest 4-6months of the year, BASEBALL, and this year we’ve added soccer to the mix. What were we thinking? Four out of six of my boys play basketball, baseball or soccer and although I love seeing them active, it makes for a very long and tiring week, every week. Two days of practice and one game day is the schedule for baseball, same for soccer, and basketball, who knows what you’ll get. I’m not complaining of course, but what about my life. Does it just stop because I have kids? Your answer may be different from mine, but I say, “no,” and “Hell No,” as a matter of fact.
I realize as parents we have a responsibility to our children, and that means a sacrifice in our time. Especially since I have seven children, I expect to give up a lot more of my time. But sitting on the toilet seat for an extra 10 minutes just to get some “alone time” is no longer enough for me.I have to find time for myself, no, I need to find time for myself, and just as importantly I need to make sure my husband and I spend time together. Really, where will be in 15 years if we spend all our time with these kids and not enough time together? I’ll tell you, we probably won’t last 10 minutes after the last kid leaves the house.
Our youngest child is nearly 3 years old, meaning we have 15 years until the last child leaves the nest. We have to prepare right now for the time when it’ll be just the two of us. I want to know the man who will be staring in my face all day, (as we won’t have any interruptions from the
starring without any kids in the house). While I can’t wait for that time to come, as with any thing in life, one must be prepared. I would hate to wake up to a quiet house in 15 years and not know the man who is lying next to me because we were living just as roommates all this time.
So while I will always make time for my kids to play sports, everyone should know that I probably won’t be at every single game, and I probably won’t stand in the cold at every single
practice. Anyway, here we go! 4-6 months of scheduling time for sports, family time, alone time and time for me and Bobby. Wish me luck.
My Birthday's Tomorrow?!
It’s the eve of my 37th birthday, and so many things are running
through my head. I mean, it’s just another day right? I’ve been 36 for 365 days now,
(leap year last year), but something about actually having to say “37” out loud was
at first a little troubling for me. I’m getting “older” and there’s nothing I can do about it.
The crazy thing is though, I still feel young. Where does the time go?
While at first I was feeling a little depressed, and thinking, I’m getting
“old,” I came to a realization, that I’m only as “old” as I feel, and honestly
I don’t feel old at all. Despite my teenagers making fun of me and constantly
me telling me, “mom, you’re so old,” they know what’s up, and so do I. “I’m
jamming on the one.”
I met a woman this weekend who is 93 years old. She was sporting
a jumpsuit, and her hair looked so healthy and vibrant. Thinking
about her helped me to decide that I’m going to make a conscious effort to stay
young and heart and young at mind. No, I don’t wish I was 17 again, or wish I
was back in high school, I love my life and how it has evolved over the years.
But I’m going to keep life fun. I’m going be happy. I’m going to make others
happy. Happiness, I believe is the secret to staying young. Frowning and being
mad all the time only ages my face. Letting these kids stress me out, no more,
stress does nothing but age my body, I’m already finding grey hairs all over the
place (if you know what I mean), I don’t need anything extra “greying” me up.
My time is now..
Tomorrow I’ll be 37 and I’m proud of that. While my age is getting
higher in number, I’m not getting “older,” I’m getting wiser and happier, and
thanking God for each new day. Instead of complaining about getting old,
I’m now thankful for the time. Time that will be used making love to my
wonderful husband and time used spending quality time with my bratty kids;
I’m not wasting any more time pouting about my age; I’m going to enjoy this
adventure that is my crazy life. And if you’re feeling the way I was about getting
older, I encourage you to do the same thing. Laugh, smile, stop complaining,
make love to the one you love, enjoy raising your kids and enjoy your crazy life too.
Just three days ago my husband and I celebrated ten years of marriage, “wow.” It seems like
just yesterday we went on our first date to a “grown folks party,” hosted by one
of my dear friends. We went as friends and came home as more than friends. You know that “chemistry” everyone talks about, well we found it that night.
It was absolutely Love at first kiss. Me probably more so than Bobby, but still the chemistry was there. A sweet kiss at the end of our night, confirmed the change we both felt in our
relationship. I remember going home, and my sister was there. I told her that night that I knew he was the one. I wanted to marry that man. I had already “revirginized,” at that point and was practicing celibacy. I knew that I would have to stick to that promise I made to God, because I really wanted to marry this man.
From that night Bobby and I got closer, we talked on the phone every day, we saw each other every day. We very, very soon exchanged the most important three words, “I love you.” I had never felt the love I had for Bobby with any other man, I knew something about this love was different, and deserved to be cherished, and I could tell by the way he held me, and accepted my vow of celibacy that he felt the same.
Bobby and I loved to watch movies, we would stay up till the wee hours of the mornings talking, laughing, watching movies and holding each other. When Bobby and I came together he had a daughter and I had two sons. We would always spend the week nights together and the weekends we would spend time as a “family,” with all three kids. One particular weekend, we weren’t going
to have any kids for the weekend, we didn’t know what to do with the free time. I remember lying on his lap while he was running his fingers through my hair, I said to him, “so no kids this weekend huh?” He replied with a big smile, “nope.” I asked him, “what are we going to do with all this free time?” He said, “ I don’t know, what do you want to do?” I replied, “hmmm….. how bout we go get married?” He looked down at me and smiled, “OK.” The rest is history….
I know a lot of people will want to wait for the perfect proposal, and that’s cool, and truly when I suggested we go get married, I don’t know if I knew he would want to do it the way we did. But what I did know is that he loved me, and I loved him. I wanted to spend the rest of my life with him, and I wanted to give him “me,” entirely. So three days after that conversation, which was about two months after that first date, we were married.
Ten years and four more kids later, we’re still going strong. Our love has evolved into something that cannot be explained with words, and I pray that God will continue to bless us, our family and our
Mom, I'm Scared
This is one sentence I am so
tired of hearing, but I’m trying to be “mom” about it and be understanding.
It’s the line my five year old has been giving us for the last few weeks. Every
time we tell him to go to bed, he finds me where ever I am in the house and
says, “mom, can I sweep in your room?” ( Yes, he pronounces his “l” sound with
the “w” sound). He goes on to say that he is too scared to close his eyes. We
keep telling him, there is nothing to be afraid of, but he’s not going for it.
It does have me somewhat concerned because just a couple of weeks ago he didn’t
mind sleeping in his own room with the lights off, but now, forget it.
fourteen year old had night terrors when he was around four or five, those were
the worse, he would cry and sometimes scream if I remember correctly, and when I
would go into the room to check on him, he was just fine, didn’t have a clue
that he was just scared to death. But with my five year old, something is a
About a week or so ago, he literally ran in my room and
hid behind the baby bed, (yes my two year old still sleeps in the baby bed;
don’t judge). I had only seen something like that in a movie, and probably a
horror movie. But more like the Wayans Brothers horror movie, because although
I was concerned, it was one of the funniest things I have ever seen. I asked
him, “what’s wrong baby?” and just as my older son couldn’t remember, my five
year old also had no clue as to what happened? I’m going to keep my eye on him,
but he is perfectly fine until it’s time to go to sleep. A big part of me
thinks he just wants to stay up, because he loves power rangers and will watch
them for hours (yes, I let my child watch hours of tv; don’t judge, he can read
too), but a small part of me is very cautious. I don’t want to be one of those
parents on the horror movies who doesn’t believe that their kid is being
tormented by an alien monster at night, and they really are. So I got my
peripheral on it. For now, I keep a blanket and a pillow on the couch in my
room, I know he’ll be in my room about 1 or 2am. No big deal I guess, because
my two year old is up about 12:30 to get out of his baby bed and into ours, and
my seven year old makes a bed on one of those dora couches you get from Toys R
Us. He comes in around 2 or 3am, (and yes he is too long for that couch, and
the cushion is gone so he might as well be laying on the floor, but hey, that’s
his choice.) All I can do is make sure there is a blanket there waiting for him
when he arrives.
“Mom, I’m scared…..” blah blah blah, I know what that
line means for me. It means Bobby and I can forget about private time. I hope
this is a short phase for him, I want him to be comfortable about falling asleep
and doing it in his own room. But until then, I’ll just have to deal with his
question every night. At least he’s cute when he asks. But no matter how cute
he is, I know all you parents know what the answer is…..two words, six
letters…….And although I don’t actually verbalize the two words to my child, I’m
definitely thinking them. I give him a big hug and a kiss on those chubby
cheeks and tell him “I’ll see you in a couple of hours..”
So this entry doesn't even have a title.
The last couple of weeks have been
crazy, but one of the most memorable days of the last few weeks was last
My four year old has been potty trained for over a year now.
Yes, it took until he was three years old to get him where he is now. Thank God
for potty training grandmas.
back to the incident. I'm off on Tuesdays and Fridays. Those are my "house
wife, stay at home mom days." I was cleaning up the front room and Mason jumps
over the couch yelling, "I have to go potty! My response was as it always is,
"pee pee or boo boo." His response as it always is, "pee pee."
continue to clean and start to realize that he's taking a little longer than it
takes to pee pee. "Mason," I yell, "are you boo booing,?" "no." I continue
cleaning and he comes back into the front room. About 15 minutes later he comes
over by me, and I see a brown spot on his pants. I bend down to give the spot a
sniff, and of course it was boo boo. I asked him, why he didn't tell me to come
help him wipe his butt. "I don't want you to wipe my butt." I go into the
bathroom and low and behold, there was boo boo in the toilet. Not only was it
in the toilet, it was finger smeared on the wall and on the door. I smelled his
hands and yep, it was there too.
"Oh My God, Mason!" Was my response,
and yes I was truly calling on God at the time. Thank God for Bleach Spray and
I explained to Mason, that he still needs help wiping his
butt, and he understood. The next day, when he went to the potty. I got a
call, "Mom....... I'm finished."
I am a wife, mother of seven and a lawyer. The life I live is a crazy one, but I love it and wouldn't trade it for the world. I hope what I share can be an inspiration to others, but I will settle for it just giving someone a good laugh!